Developmental Milestone

• Movement: Kids are getting faster and may want to join sports and other activities like dance. They will want to begin to improve their strength, speed, and skill. 

• Cognition: Their growing minds will be wondering how things work, so be prepared to get lots of questions. They’ll want to be a part of making family choices such as where to vacation and may enjoy planning things with you. At this age, they can begin to understand and use the concept of categories. For example, Apple is a type of fruit. They can also understand the idea of making future plans. When they hang out with friends, they will plan ahead. They will also want to participate in making decisions in the family.  They will begin to pursue their own personal interest. This could mean an obsession with baseball, mystery books, or the world of Star Wars. And although their attention span is improving, their interest in things will shift pretty quickly.  They also can be more independent in their hygiene skills. They can get dressed, brush their hair and teeth, and can get ready all by themselves. 

• Physical:  Some kids may begin to undergo changes due to puberty. 

Social-Emotional Milestone 

You will find that as your child’s world gets broader, they’ll build relationships outside of their family. They will want to establish friend groups and find a sense of belonging. Bonds between their friends will grow stronger and more complicated. Most of their friends will be from the same sex. Time with friends may begin to be more important than spending time with the family. Friend groups at this age keep changing. Becoming a part of the “in crowd”  may become their reality. Kids at this age may develop more strict ethics and form their own ideas of what they believe to be right or wrong. They may have a difficult time accepting that they made a mistake and may have a hard time taking responsibility for their actions. But if you, as a parent, set an example, they are more likely to follow. They’ll be easily embarrassed and may not take criticism well. Moods at this age may be very different. They might begin to experience changes in their hormones. This means that their emotions may also differ every minute. They may begin to act rude or unreasonable. At this age, they are also able to recognize that they are misbehaving and can properly apologize.Common fears that they might have are about crime, storms, anxieties about losing a parent which will replace their fears about monsters. 

Life Skills Puberty

Puberty marks a natural event in a child’s life where they begin to change physically, psychologically, and emotionally.  During this phase, your child will mature rapidly and will begin developing more mature reproductive organs. This change is usually brought about by different hormones,or chemical messengers that influence how your child’s body will change. Puberty can be as short as 18 months or can continue on for 5 years. It is affected by genes, what they eat, and social factors. Things to expect include growing acne, growth spurts, body odor, changes in their sexual organs, body hair, and different body parts change. For girls, they will start having their periods.  With this physical change, you will also see emotional changes, such as changes in mood and sleeping patterns. Challenges, such as body image issues will definitely show up. Children at this age are also quick to make rash decisions, often without taking the results into consideration. Expect more risky behaviors.  Having a child go through all these changes is not easy. We need to accept that these changes are natural. Mood swings will happen but let us remember, most of the time, they are not directed at us. It’s the hormone changes. Let your kids have their privacy and help them establish a sense of independence. Make sure to establish trust with your kids.  Guide them through these years and make sure that they know you can lean on you if they have questions or if any problems arise. Don’t be afraid to ask for help from relatives, friends, and or your child’s doctor if you don’t know.  For more information on what to expect for your growing adolescent children, check out these gender-specific articles on puberty. [Article]

Action Items

• Even though they may want to have a sense of freedom from the family, they will still want emotional support from their parents. Make sure that you  Encourage talking between you and your child to build that trust. 

•  Even at this age, peer pressure and the effects of self-esteem are important factors in your kid's social life. Make sure that kids are equipped with the confidence to believe in their values and conscience. 

• Allow them to explore their different interests. Go to the library and research more information or take them out to the field. 

• As their schedules get filled, make sure to keep track of what their daily activities are. 

• Set responsibilities around the house by letting them help out in chores.

•  Encourage their school work and make sure they have a space for studying. 

• Let your kids know that you are there for them if they have any questions. 

• Find opportunities to boost up your child and give them real support by focusing on their strengths.